Articles & Resources

Communicating with Substance Abusers: Part 2

Communicating with a loved one who is battling substance abuse can feel like shouting underwater, like no matter what you say, your words go unheard and your emotions get dismissed. It’s exhausting. It’s frustrating. It’s painful.

Last week, we talked about the importance of boundaries, pausing before you speak, and using positive “I feel” statements. This week I want to challenge you to truly practice setting those boundaries and writing out those positive “I feel” statements.

The Power of Boundaries

Healthy communication starts with clear and firm boundaries:- If they are under the influence, do not engage.- If they are yelling or being verbally abusive, walk away.- If they send cruel or manipulative text messages or emails, don’t respond. Instead, protect your peace by saying:- “I will talk to you when you are sober.”- “I will not engage in conversations that are disrespectful. ”Remember: You are not responsible for their reaction. You are responsible for protecting your well-being. How to Speak So They Hear YouRather than starting with “you” statements that feel like attacks, use “I feel” statements to express your emotions without escalating the conflict: Don’t say: “You always ruin our evenings. ”Do say: “I enjoy our time together when you're sober. ”Don’t say: “You’re so selfish when you drink. ”Do say: “I feel hurt when your drinking takes priority over our time together. ”These small shifts can create a more productive dialogue.

Your Challenge This Week

Take a moment to write down two boundaries you will uphold when communicating with your loved one, as well as writing out as many of your positive “I feel” statements as you need. “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” Ephesians 4:29 ESV

The Father to the Fatherless

“Yet you, Lord, are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” Isaiah 64:8

If you grew up without the presence of a Father in your life, you may hold this scripture near and dear to your heart.

In the Psychological Studies community, it is said that those who lack parental relationships may be at a higher risk of depression, anxiety, or feelings of loneliness. A missing parent can create long-term feelings of instability, and the absence of a father figure can lead to challenges in forming trusting relationships later in life. 

I grew up without the relationship of an earthly father. I was fortunate, though, to learn during my teen years that God could be my Heavenly Father. Like the verse says in Deuteronomy 31:6, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified, for the Lord your God goes with you, he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

How comforting it is to know we have a Heavenly Father who will never leave us or forsake us! I have always needed my relationship with God, but never as much as I do now as I walk along this long road of grief. I am consistently amazed at how true his promises are. To find true healing, we must commit and re-commit daily to know our Heavenly Father. The Bible shows us how we can know our heavenly Father as closely, if not closer than we do our earthly parents. The following verses describe some ways:

“Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him.” Psalm 34:8

“Finally brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable - if anything is excellent or praiseworthy - think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is - his good, pleasing and perfect will.” Romans 12:2

“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me - just as the Father knows me and I know the Father - and I lay down my life for the sheep.” John 10:14-15

These verses encourage us to meditate on the virtues of our Heavenly Father. When we align our thoughts and actions with his character, we can be assured that our minds will be renewed as well. God doesn’t promise this only for his children who aren’t grieving, in fact, he says in Psalms 34:18, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.”

While there can be a haze of emotions, some caught between what was and what could have been, let’s remember that our heavenly Father wants to heal us.

Let’s challenge one another to be discerning as we keep our thoughts on what is good, pure, and lovely. Allowing ourselves to live in the truth that, although we walk with a heavy heart and miss our loved ones more than others will ever know, we can still grow in understanding and experience a life full of God’s rich blessings and his peace.

Isn’t this what every good parent wants for their children?

Shining the Light that God Shone for Me: The Story of Jessica Brackett

Early Life and Family

My name is Jessica Brackett. I am originally from Tahlequah, Oklahoma, and by the grace of God, today I am three and a half years sober!

I was born to two very young parents. My mom and dad were both 15 when I was conceived, so my grandparents—who have been married for 54 years—took on more of the parenting roles in my life. They always showed me affection, love, and attention whenever they were around me. They made sure my three brothers and I were provided for, and I am so grateful for the stability and guidance they gave.

Today, I know that my mother did the best she could with what she knew as a young mom, especially because my father was absent. As a girl, I disregarded my feelings about his absence and instead took on the role of protector and caretaker for my brothers. Whenever I needed comfort, I could ride my bike to my grandparents’ house.

I didn’t grow up around drugs or alcohol. We attended church at Free Will Baptist Church when I was younger, and then we didn’t.

Cheerleading and Rebellion

From 3rd grade to 7th grade, I attended Grand View Elementary School, where my grandfather was on the school board. I participated in competitive cheerleading and excelled, but cheer became an outlet for a false sense of self. I channeled everything into becoming the best, using it to distract from negative emotions.

In 7th grade, my mother remarried, and we moved to Locust Grove. That meant no more cheerleading, no grandparents nearby, and my world came crashing down. At age 13, I was trying to find myself with no outlet, security, or stability. Resentment grew toward my mom, and rebellion began.

I started seeking validation in older men and became promiscuous. At 14, I began drinking alcohol and sneaking out to party. By my sophomore year, I was expelled from school and kicked off the cheer squad after being taken advantage of at a party. Humiliated, I dropped out of high school, and things spiraled further.

Addiction and Struggles

At 16, I moved in with my dad and his wife Jenny in Tahlequah. They made me finish high school, and Jenny took me to church, but I felt out of place and depressed. After graduation, I went to beauty college, started smoking marijuana, and was introduced to methamphetamine by 18. I cut myself off from my family, only reaching out when I needed money.

At 20, I found out I was pregnant with my first son, Jay, and later my second son, Colby. I stayed sober for five years, doing my best to hold things together. I told myself I would do anything to keep my family intact. But after years of covering for my partner’s addiction and enduring abuse, I eventually fell back into the same cycle—men, drugs, trauma, repeat.

My addiction escalated quickly. I asked my grandparents to take guardianship of my boys because I couldn’t be present. Afterward, I sank deeper, using heroin and fentanyl. I carried shame, guilt, humiliation, and trauma, convinced I was a lost cause.

By 29, I was broken, contemplating suicide, and begging God, “End me or end this!”

A Divine Encounter

My family, out of options, cut me off. Suicidal and fading fast, I was couch-surfing and in and out of the crisis center. Eventually, I was picked up by Officer Billy Kammerzel, who delivered a message of hope: “If you want something different, you can achieve it. But only you can make that decision.”

He took me back to the crisis center, and my journey to recovery began. I went to The Oaks in McAlester and started reading Proverbs, not even realizing at first that God was answering the prayer I had cried out in desperation.

At 30, I knew I didn’t want my life to look like it had before. I needed more than treatment—I needed true change.

Finding Hope is Alive

Hope is Alive came to The Oaks and shared testimonies about Jesus with joy and authenticity. I doubted I would fit in, but I saw the light of God shining through them and wanted what they had. I even told one of them, “One day I will do what you just did,” though fear consumed me.

When I arrived at HIA, the love of God hit me. I surrendered and began following the women around me who modeled joy, honesty, and faith. Women from Crossings Church came weekly to lead Bible studies, showing me consistency, love, and care. Through them, I saw that Jesus could heal my humiliation and trauma.

Transformation and Purpose

At HIA, I had to fight lies that told me to leave or that I didn’t belong. But with the support of leaders, I pressed on. After a year, I was offered a job with HIA as a regional outreach coordinator, sharing my testimony in treatment centers.

I graduated from HIA in January 2024 and began therapy. In 2025, I moved home to reconcile with my family and my sons, now 11 and 13. I continue to work with HIA, building relationships with churches and treatment centers. God is nowhere close to finished—He is just getting started with my family.

Living in the Light

After years of searching for a father figure in the wrong places, I finally know the Father. Having experienced His unconditional love, I want to tell everyone about it.

Today, I am a fully present mother, granddaughter, daughter, and sister. I speak to families who are suffering in silence, breaking the stigma that kept me trapped for so long.

I am grateful for God’s provision, my family’s forgiveness, and the thriving community I am part of today. HIA gave me tools, community, and the opportunity to share the Gospel in places that desperately need it—and for that, I am eternally grateful.

The Demonstration of Grace: The Story of TJ Tomlin

This story is from TJ Tomlin, who works as a Regional Outreach Coordinator for Hope is Alive and who recently celebrated three years of continuous sobriety.

Early Years and Success

I started drinking pretty heavily in college, a habit that continued after graduation and well into my adult years. Right after college, I married Dawn, the love of my life, and spent 17 years as the owner and operator of my own MMA gym, training and competing regularly.

My gym became very successful, but at a cost. I neglected my family and ended up addicted to opiates after many injuries and surgeries. During that time, I would have told you I was a believer, but the way I lived said otherwise. I was one of those professing Christians who lived in a way that didn’t represent Christ at all.

Addiction and Collapse

The opiate addiction became worse and worse over time. Eventually, I became a lying, cheating drug addict, leaving behind a wake of destruction in my life and the lives of those around me.

Just under four years ago, it all came crashing down. I was caught in infidelity, and my wife was deeply hurt and scorned. My opiate use and addiction were now public and out for the world to see.

A Demonstration of Grace

Two years before she caught me in adultery, God had already started working on Dawn. She found a true relationship with Jesus, began attending a regular women’s Bible study, and started working on her past trauma. She also stopped drinking and began pursuing her own sobriety.

I was too consumed by my addiction to notice, but her deep relationship with Jesus prepared her for what was to come.

A couple of days after catching me in adultery, Dawn looked me in the eye and told me that Jesus loves me and forgives me, and that she loves me and forgives me as well.

At that moment, I immediately surrendered my life to Jesus. Her demonstration of the gospel brought me to Christ, and since that day—April 14, 2021—I have been sober.

A New Life in Christ

I checked into a 90-day treatment facility and never looked back. Jesus is now the center of my marriage and my life.

I recently sold my MMA business and committed my life to ministry, now working full-time for Hope is Alive. I owe my sobriety and my life to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Stronger on the Other Side: The Story of Jade King

This story is from Jade King, who works as a Recruiting and Outreach Coordinator for Hope is Alive and who recently celebrated three years of continuous sobriety.

A Dark Path

I was a wild child who faced challenges that led me down a dark path away from the Lord and into addiction. I found myself seeking validation through relationships with men, which eventually led me to rock bottom, with actions driven by ignorance, anger, and selfishness.

I was unaware that the consequences of my choices would lead to incarceration and the loss of my children. That loss pushed me further into the darkness of self-hatred and pain.

Finding Faith and Strength

My past struggles led me down a challenging path, but through it all, by the grace of God, I found the strength to overcome addiction and rediscover my faith. My experiences have shaped me into the compassionate and determined person I am today. Both heartbreaking experiences of trauma and triumphant experiences of freedom have become part of my story.

A key promise has come true in my life: the promise of not regretting the past nor wishing to shut the door on it. Without the dark moments in my life, I would never have become the woman God always intended for me to be.

A Beacon of Hope

Today, I stand as a beacon of hope and inspiration for those suffering from the disease of addiction. I strive to lead by example, showing others the power of redemption and the importance of staying true to oneself.

I am a leader when I can lead and a student when I can learn. Remaining teachable is a commitment I hold close, along with walking the right path and helping others do the same. I live this out daily by sponsoring other women through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous and through my full-time job as a recruiting administrative assistant for Hope is Alive.

Looking Ahead

I envision myself as a leader who uplifts and empowers other women and addicts. I strive to be a mother my children can trust and confide in, creating a safe space where they can turn when in turmoil.

My goal is to excel in the field of Psychology and Neuroscience while keeping a humble spirit and remaining approachable, providing a safe place for others to understand who they are in Christ and in their recovery.

Above all, my ultimate desire is to spread love and kindness through action and to embody the teachings of Jesus in all that I do.

Stronger Than Ever

My journey serves as a reminder that no matter how challenging the road may be, with faith and perseverance, one can emerge stronger and more compassionate than ever before.

God Gave Me a Vision; Now He’s Fulfilling It: The Story of Mandy Maloney

This story is from Mandy Maloney, who currently works as a Program Manager Intern for Hope is Alive and recently celebrated over two and a half years of continuous sobriety.

A Vision in Jail

I remember sitting in county jail and God giving me a vision. In it, I stood on a stage speaking to people, telling them about his message. I never knew that, almost 15 years later, that vision would be a reality.

I have suffered many years of heartache and abuse due to my addiction and dragged my family through the mud with me. I always knew Jesus was the answer because, while I was in jail, I would hear about him and feel his presence. But as soon as I got out, I would hit the ground running again.

Prison Life

I chose a life of prostitution and lived under pimps who controlled my every move until I turned 19. That life led me into a dangerous situation and landed me in prison, where I spent much of my adult life.

Prison hardened me. I forgot how to love. I had kids and didn’t even miss them. My whole life became engulfed in prison life, and I forgot there was anything beyond the prison walls.

Addiction and Abuse

After prison, I got married and started a family, but I fell back into addiction. My husband was ready to settle down and I wasn’t, which ruined our marriage. When we separated, he got custody of the kids, and I ended up in an abusive relationship.

I suffered spiritual and physical abuse until he finally went to prison with a 20-year sentence. I spiraled into psychosis, shaved my head, and walked the streets barefoot, talking to myself. I believed I was moving between the realms of heaven and hell.

My mom wanted desperately to help me, so she brought me home. But in my broken state, I tried to steal her car and ran her over, breaking her ribs. Once again, I landed myself in prison.

Rock Bottom and Healing

My mental health had deteriorated so badly that I spent a year in a suicide cell to keep from harming myself or others. Then, one day, I received a letter of apology from my abuser. Something within me clicked, and I was normal again—just like that.

God healed me of the trauma that had bound me in psychosis for the past year. I was finally able to begin the journey of healing.

A New Purpose

Inside prison, I completed a bootcamp in a leadership position. Afterward, I came to Hope is Alive and became a house manager. Since then, I’ve been able to use my story to help other women dealing with the same kind of trauma.

I eventually joined the staff at Hope is Alive, and now I get to pour life and Jesus into women every day.

Vision Fulfilled

The vision God showed me 15 years ago has been made true in my life—thanks to God and Hope is Alive.

Helpless, Homeless, and Hopeless: The Story of Jackie Matlock

This story is from Jackie Matlock, who currently works as an intern for Hope is Alive and recently celebrated 14 months of continuous sobriety.

A Chaotic Beginning

Helpless. Homeless. Hopeless. That may be how part of my story started; however, that is not how this book of my life will end.

The early years of my life can be summed up in one word: chaotic. Physical, psychological, and sexual abuse caused PTSD, and I quickly developed a distortion of reality. Escaping reality seemed vital—it felt like the only way to survive.

I experienced what it was to be blackout drunk for the first time at the age of six and began smoking marijuana at the age of twelve. By fifteen, I tried my first hard drug. At that point, I had begun to write my own story.

Even though I had been told using drugs was wrong, it felt right. Proverbs 14:12 says, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.”

The Depths of Addiction

As the years went on, I was confident my addiction would kill me—and I was okay with that.

John 10:10 says, “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”

Surrendering to Life

When I walked through the doors of Hope is Alive, I surrendered. I wanted life. But how could someone like me have a good, normal, and full life?

Romans 3:24 says, “All are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.” What an amazing concept.

As I allowed grace to fill my life, I began to understand that God had a plan for me. Jeremiah 29:11 promises, “For I know the plans I have for you… plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

For the first time in a long time, I felt something I had not felt in years—hope. Hope for a better future than I could have ever imagined.

Living with Hope

Today, life brings daily challenges, but I can face them with hope. I still encounter adversity every day, but with the help of Hope is Alive, trusted leaders, and mentors, I have begun to live out God’s calling for my life.

For the first time in a long time, hope is alive in my life.

Finding and Remembering My Why: The Story of Angi Cooper

This story is from Angi Cooper, who works as Program Manager for Hope is Alive in Kansas City.

Recovery is a journey that requires more than just willpower—it requires purpose. For many in recovery, that purpose is what we call our “Why.”

Our Why is the reason we choose this path every single day, despite the challenges and setbacks. It is deeply personal, a reminder of what life in recovery can bring.

What “My Why” Means in Recovery

In recovery, having a Why goes beyond simply wanting to live a sober life. It’s about understanding what we stand to gain or protect by staying on this path.

Whether it’s family, personal growth, a career, or freedom from past struggles, having a reason gives us strength to keep moving forward. Our Why becomes our anchor, holding us steady when life gets turbulent.

My Personal Why

For over 30 years, I struggled in and out of addiction. I would build a life for myself, start doing well, and then tear it all back down. This cycle of hope and despair continued until I finally chose to get the help I needed.

It was only when I surrendered completely and stepped into my calling that things began to truly change. For a long time, I felt an inner knowing that I was made for something more. But instead of leaning into that calling, I ran from it. Facing the hard truths within myself felt overwhelming, so I avoided them.

Through it all, God sustained me, even in my darkest days. He held me together, allowing me to reach this point where I can live fully and freely today. Now I am who God has called me to be—living in his purpose, not just for myself but for those I love.

I have four children and eight grandchildren, each of them a reason for me to keep going. One of them, like me, struggles with addiction, and seeing them fight the same battle has made my Why even clearer.

I want to show them—and my other children—that change is possible, that there’s a way to break the cycle and reclaim a life that feels whole and fulfilling. My Why is to create a legacy of resilience, to be someone my kids can look up to and rely on, and to finally live up to the potential I once ran from.

Today, I share hope, Jesus, and my story every chance I get. I believe the heavens may look different if I don’t. My journey is no longer just about me; it’s about the lives I might touch and the hearts that might find healing through my story.

Challenges and Staying Connected to Your Why

Recovery isn’t a straight line, and there are days when it feels hard to stay the course. Sometimes the world tests my commitment.

During those moments, reconnecting with my Why helps me refocus. I remind myself why I started, why I fought so hard to get here, and what’s at stake. Each time I do, I feel a renewed sense of purpose and resilience.

To everyone on this journey: remember, your Why doesn’t have to be monumental—it just has to be meaningful to you. Take time to reflect on what drives you and hold onto that reason tightly.

In our toughest moments, it’s our Why that keeps us moving forward. I encourage you to find or revisit your Why—it’s the foundation that makes each step of this journey worthwhile.

Finding My Way Back: The Story of Lindsay Cutbirth

Hello, my name is Lindsay Cutbirth, an employee of the ministry Hope Is Alive and an alumna of the program. I began my journey of living in my calling a few years ago, and it has blessed my life tremendously.

The “why” behind what I do each and every day is being a mom who lost her way and became a person I did not recognize.

A Later Start to Addiction

My story may look a little different since I didn’t begin struggling with addiction until my mid-thirties. After back-to-back surgeries, I became addicted to opiates for eight years.

At that time, I had been married for 21 years, was a military wife for 15 years, and had two amazing children. We looked like an all-American family—until we no longer did.

My ex-husband began using after he retired, and with our codependent relationship, it became the perfect storm. Verbal and physical abuse entered my life, leaving me shattered and broken.

We began living out of hotels as a family. Eventually, my parents witnessed enough destruction and took me to court to gain custody of my daughter. The toxic life continued, and I turned to fentanyl and meth.

Spiraling Out of Control

My world kept unraveling. Everything I cherished had been taken, and I spiraled further into addiction.

I knew who God was, being raised as a Southern Baptist pastor’s granddaughter. But I was running from God—and from myself.

My family fought and prayed for me daily while also setting solid boundaries. Ultimately, I had to be the one to make the decision to surrender it all to God. I wasn’t sure it would work, but it was better than where I was standing at the time.

Rebuilding Through Recovery

I came close to losing my life due to health complications from addiction. After thirty-seven days of rehab, I found a new way of living my life at Hope Is Alive.

When I walked through the doors, I was broken and a shell of a person. I lived in fear of the unknown and of the future. Where would I start? How would I begin to heal?

It was a slow learning experience. I began to trust those around me and to open up—putting one foot in front of the other. At 41 years old, I was starting a new life.

My parents had adopted my daughter, and I was not allowed contact. My son was an adult and wanted nothing to do with me after the years of pain my addiction had caused. My words held no value anymore. That’s when I told my family, “Just watch me!”

It took determination and hard work every single day. I had to lay down pain and learn to forgive—not only others but also myself.

A New Calling

As I worked through my program, I accepted an internship with the very organization that had radically changed my life. In that moment, I knew God was calling me to something greater than I had ever imagined.

Blessings began to come, including the restoration of my relationship with my children. Over time, they began to trust me again and believe in what I said.

Living Out My Why

Today, I wake up every morning grateful that I get to be an example to other moms. The reason I keep fighting is because I have their backs with every challenge placed in front of them.

They want to be the moms they’ve always dreamed of being, and I want them to know it’s possible. There is nothing like seeing the light and pride shine out of them when they reconnect with their children—or hold their child for the first time in years.

That is sacrificial love, just as Jesus had for us.

I now get to witness families being brought back together and women living out the truth that Jesus is always the answer.

Through My Failures, I Succeed

Defining Myself by Failure

I am a failure. I have failed more times than I can count, and there were many times when I allowed my failures to define my reality in a self-defeating way.

I took every setback, every missed opportunity, and every moment where I had fallen short not as a building block toward success, but as a pitfall that held me back from all the wondrous things life can afford.

I was in complete despair and found myself paralyzed by the very thought of failing, so I quit attempting anything at all.

A Shift in Perspective

Then one day, God shifted my perspective.

While working on my 4th Step of AA, I began to look at all the defects of character I was exhibiting, and a fire was lit deep within me. I no longer saw these defects as a barrier, but as a checklist to becoming a better man.

I was no longer paralyzed by the thought of failing but accepted the fact that my failures don’t define me. What I do in the midst of failure does.

Embracing Failure as Growth

After this realization, I began to see every setback, every missed opportunity, and every shortcoming as a celebratory occasion. Through my failure, I was getting one step closer to success.

I shifted from a state of inaction to one of action. I took hold of every moment and understood the importance of doing rather than worrying. As long as I was doing something, I was heading toward a solution instead of wallowing in stagnation.

I became rejuvenated. My willingness to take a shot and miss, rather than take no shot at all, instilled in me a fearlessness that is unshakeable.

Learning from Great Examples

Michael Jordan once said:

“I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game-winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

Walt Disney was once asked how he stayed motivated in the face of defeat and responded:

“All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all the troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me. You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.”

A Biblical Reminder

Even scripture encourages us to learn from our mistakes and to get back up when we fail. Proverbs 24:16 says:

“…for though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again…”

In other words, don’t quit before the miracle happens. Don’t let fear of failure prevent you from becoming the absolute best version of yourself. Allow failure to assure you that you are on the right track and that you won’t have to relive the experience again.

There will always be another challenge waiting to help you grow, so embrace it. Celebrate your new understanding of what works and what doesn’t. Persevere and seize every opportunity for advancement in life.

Conclusion

I am a failure.

Through my failures, I succeed.

My Greatest Pain Became My Greatest Purpose

Introduction

My name is Brie and I am a recovering alcoholic. Today I am blessed to work for a ministry where I get to share the gospel with people while also leading them out of the bondage of addiction.

However, there was a time when I was the one who needed rescuing. I was desperate for help but looking in all the wrong places. Let me share a quick story of what it was like, what happened, and where I am now.

A Painful Childhood

I grew up in a home that was extremely dysfunctional. I never knew my mom and dad as a couple. They split when I was a baby. My dad worked a lot and battled his own struggles, and my mom was an addict.

I was passed around to whoever could take care of me at the time, so I never felt like I belonged or had a real home.

When I was in middle school, my dad passed away. Around the same time, my stepdad was diagnosed with stage 4 terminal lung cancer. During my freshman year of high school, he passed away too.

Early Addiction

Once I lost my dad, I started dabbling in anything that numbed the pain—weed, boys, self-harm, and rage. By the time I lost my stepdad, I dove even deeper into those unhealthy coping mechanisms.

I started experimenting with pills and cocaine. I left home at 14 and moved in with my boyfriend. I played varsity sports and even graduated high school early, all while maintaining my addiction.

Spiraling Further

Things only got worse. I went to college, but when my granddad got sick, I moved back home. My relationship had turned abusive, and I was struggling with an eating disorder on top of everything else.

I walked through my grandpa’s last six weeks with him before cancer took him quickly and brutally. After his passing, I spiraled into even harder drugs—fentanyl, Xanax, meth, really anything and everything.

Consequences

I went through five years of hardcore opiate addiction before getting into serious trouble with the law. Once it started unraveling, it went fast.

I moved back in with my mom, who was also in full-blown addiction. Our relationship became toxic and codependent. I was arrested multiple times for trafficking narcotics, larceny, grand theft auto, and selling drugs.

Eventually, I reached a breaking point. I was so defeated and desperate, ready to end my life in any way I could. That’s when God stepped in and did for me what I could not do for myself.

A Turning Point

God placed me in jail with no way out. From there, I went to sober living and started praying and searching for a God of my understanding. That’s when I found Jesus.

I got baptized, stepped into leadership, and began helping other women who were starting their own recovery journeys. I moved halfway across the country and started working for Hope is Alive.

Heartbreak and Healing

Then tragedy struck again. My mom passed away from her addiction. My worst nightmare came true, and I was angry, grieving, confused, and lost.

I went back to the basics—finding a home group, a sponsor, a church, a therapist, and a community. I took it one minute at a time.

Eventually, after lots of prayer, healing, and support, I forgave my mom and forgave myself. I stayed sober and healed from something I never thought I would survive.

A New Perspective

Why am I telling you this? For a couple of reasons.

First, no matter what you have walked through or are going through, there is another way—a better way.

Second, on the days I didn’t want to keep going, I remembered my mom. The person I once resented became my why and my passion.

I realized that my mom loved me deeply. She was just trying to navigate life for the first time and got lost in her own vices. Today, I know she was my biggest fan and loved me more than anything in the world.

Purpose Restored

I miss her dearly, but she is the fire in my heart and the spark in my eye for why I keep going every day. People need to be free. People need help. And there are kids out there who need their parents back.

I don’t want to stop until that is complete.

Today, I work for a ministry. I help other recovering addicts. I am married to a wonderful man. I have family restoration, no more legal troubles, a car, and a beautiful relationship with God.

My greatest pain became my greatest purpose.

So thank you, Momma, and thank you, Jesus, for turning me around and placing this calling on my life.

God’s Promises for Families of Drug Addicts and Alcoholics

Loving someone trapped in addiction can leave you feeling hopeless and overwhelmed. But even in the darkest moments, God’s promises remain true.

The YouVersion Bible Reading Plan, God’s Promises for Families of Drug Addicts and Alcoholics, reminds you of God’s unshakable love and faithfulness. As you walk through the storm of addiction, this plan points you back to His truth and hope for both you and your loved one.

Start the plan here: God’s Promises for Families of Drug Addicts and Alcoholics