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Never Say Never: Recovery is Possible
Finding Hope Family Support Groups
Impact Stories
Written By
Finding Hope Team
Never Say Never: Recovery is Possible
I distinctly remember the first time I listened to Amy LaRue’s story on her Finding Hope podcast. I thought to myself, “There’s no way my husband would ever go to treatment or that I could help people in the way she does. My story is so different. My husband is so different.”
Yet, I truly hoped something like that would happen to me. I related to her story more than I wanted to admit. I, too, thought my husband had brain cancer. I also would tell people he was at home because of an illness, when really he was just too intoxicated or high to attend. The night I listened to that podcast was the first moment I can recall the Lord revealing to me that I was not alone as the wife of an addict.
I listened to the podcast for months before I finally worked up enough courage to walk into a Finding Hope meeting. I was terrified and embarrassed, and I was shocked to find that I was met with people I could immediately relate to, and a leader (Rhonda Kemp) who showed empathy and compassion in a way I’d never experienced before.
As I began to attend meetings, I was able to fully grasp that I was not alone, it wasn't my fault, and that there was hope.
Rhonda encouraged me to set boundaries, and I learned that loving my husband looked nothing like what I had been doing for the past several years. The Lord used Finding Hope to give me the strength to focus on my own recovery and stand firm in boundaries that I truly thought I’d never be able to set. I had always promised myself I would never kick my husband out; I thought it would make me a bad wife. I thought it meant I’d given up on my husband and our marriage. Ultimately, I justified the need to keep him close because he was suicidal and a Type 1 Diabetic. I thought he'd surely die if I kicked him out.
However, there came a time when I was finally strong enough to tell Daniel he couldn’t come home. And in the Lord’s timing and in His goodness, He used it to lead Daniel to a place where he was finally ready to admit he had a problem and needed help.
I am confident that the Lord used Finding Hope to educate, encourage, and equip me for all that I would experience while loving an addict. I am forever grateful that Finding Hope taught me that I need recovery, too. And I’m truly humbled that the Lord has gifted me a story that I get to share with others.
I never thought I’d be here today saying: My husband attended treatment five different times, has been almost 500 days sober to date, leads a weekly AA meeting, has sponsees, and we have conversations about recovery and addiction almost daily. And I never ever thought I’d lead my own Finding Hope meeting.
But I list all of those out to encourage each of you that there is hope... and to never say “never,” because we serve a mighty God who can do infinitely more than all we can ever ask, think, or imagine.
With hope,
Hayley Gough | Wichita, KS
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