Becoming the Father They Deserve: Recovering From Addiction

Becoming the Father They Deserve: Recovering From Addiction

The moment Jeremy walked through the door, his boys rushed forward to hug him. His youngest couldn’t stop smiling, and his oldest couldn’t stop crying.

After weeks apart, their dad was finally home.

"And then I told them I was only there for a couple of hours and had to go back,” he shared.

It wasn't an easy goodbye. But it reminded Jeremy of why he came to The Healing Center in the first place. He wanted his boys to have their dad back.

“When the boys were younger, we'd wrestle, jump on the trampoline, and have these championship matches where the winner got to wear a belt and pose for pictures,” Jeremy recalled with a laugh. “I never won, of course.”

Though for Jeremy, it was never about winning. The real prize was getting to spend time with his boys. Some of his favorite memories as a father aren't the big milestones. They're the ordinary afternoons spent laughing together.

Even from The Healing Center, miles away from home, Jeremy could tell story after story about them, smiling at the good memories and tearing up at the thought of everything he had missed.

“I didn’t think I’d spend my oldest son’s twelfth birthday at The Healing Center trying to get sober," Jeremy admitted. “And I didn’t know how tough it would be.”

He wanted to be home celebrating with his family. But as difficult as the separation was, Jeremy knew every day he spent at The Healing Center was an investment in the future he wanted with his boys.

The future where he doesn't miss birthdays. The future where family trips aren't cut short by his addiction. The future where he gets to go to Thunder games with them. The future where his sons know they can count on their dad to be fully present.

Healing from an Addiction to Alcohol

For Jeremy, healing wasn't just about breaking free from addiction. It was about becoming the husband, father, and man God created him to be.

To do that, he had to completely embrace everything The Healing Center has to offer.

"I got here and realized I didn't have to carry that shame, guilt, and embarrassment anymore," Jeremy shared. "I knew God had forgiven me, and that my family had forgiven me. But I had a really hard time forgiving myself. I had resigned myself to the fact that I was just going to carry that weight for the rest of my life. Then I got here and learned that healing isn't just about stopping the drinking. It's about getting to the root of the problem. That's why it's called The Healing Center. They help you work through the things underneath the addiction to find true freedom.”

The Creation of an Alcoholic

As a child, Jeremy developed what he now recognizes as an addictive personality. Once he committed to something, he did it wholeheartedly. Whether it was collecting thousands of baseball cards or coins, or diving into some new hobby that caught his attention, he became completely consumed by it.

So, when he started drinking as a teenager, he didn't realize his experience was different from everyone else's.

“We'd go out, sit on the tailgate, drink beer, and just hang out," he explained. "I would drink until I was gone, and I thought it was normal. I thought everybody drank the way I did."

While his friends could stop after a few drinks, Jeremy always wanted more. More often than not, he didn’t stop until he was passed out or puking — until there was no choice but to stop.

At the time, he brushed it off as typical teenage behavior. Growing up in a small town, drinking was simply part of the culture. Unfortunately, that pattern followed him into college, where freedom and independence gave him even more opportunities to drink.

Yet, God was with him the entire time. During his sophomore year, he met a group of Christian students whose lives stood in stark contrast to his own.

"They were so joyful, and they had so much peace," Jeremy remembered. "I wanted what they had."

Shortly after, Jeremy surrendered his life to Christ and pursued his faith with the same intensity he had once devoted to everything else. He entered ministry, got married, started a family, and built a successful career in law enforcement.

For years, alcohol was a chapter of his past.

But his tendency to cope by throwing himself into something — anything — had never truly been addressed. So when one of the most painful seasons of his life arrived, those unresolved struggles came rushing back.

After years in law enforcement, Jeremy unexpectedly lost the career he had built much of his identity around.

"When that was gone, I didn't know who I was anymore," Jeremy said. “I just felt defeated.”

Feeling embarrassed, angry, ashamed, and unsure of the future, Jeremy began isolating himself from the people around him and turned to alcohol instead.

"I remember thinking, ‘I'm drinking, and now I'm smiling and laughing’," he recalled. "So I started drinking all the time. I would tell my wife I was going out to the shed or running an errand," Jeremy said. "Really, I was just finding another opportunity to drink."

As addiction tightened its grip, alcohol became the first thing he reached for in the morning and the last thing he thought about before bed. The shame he felt pushed him further into drinking, and the drinking only created more shame — especially when he thought about how his choices were affecting his family.

"There were times I'd stay in my room for days at a time, and my wife would tell the boys that I wasn’t feeling well," Jeremy said. "I'd cancel plans with the family or stay home while they went and did things without me. My drinking started first thing in the morning, and by the afternoon, I was driving drunk to a liquor store to buy a bottle to get through the rest of the day. Then I’d wake up and do it all over again."

The father who once spent afternoons wrestling with his boys and laughing with them on the trampoline was seemingly gone.

A New Creation in Christ

“It finally reached the point that my family had an intervention for me. I was in detox for six days before coming to The Healing Center. At the time, I had no idea where I was going. Now, I’m thankful it was here.”

In many ways, Jeremy feels like a different person from the man who first arrived. As he's worked through the trauma, shame, embarrassment, and guilt underneath his addiction, he's found something he didn't think was possible: the ability to forgive himself.

“I’ve been in constant prayer since coming to The Healing Center, and I feel like God is telling me this is the ministry He wants me to be in,” Jeremy shared. “I’m not embarrassed by my story anymore. I’m not ashamed of it. I want to answer God's call to minister to people struggling with addiction and share how I found freedom, because the only way you can do it is by surrendering everything to Him.”

While Jeremy feels called to help others battling addiction, his first ministry is waiting for him at home. This Father's Day, instead of spending the day trapped in addiction, he got to celebrate it sober.

For two boys who never stopped loving their dad — and a dad who never stopped loving his boys — graduating from The Healing Center and stepping into a new life of sobriety is a gift greater than any other Father's Day present.

The Healing Center gave Jeremy what addiction never could: hope. Now, it’s inspiring that same hope in countless families just like his.

Recovery isn’t some distant dream at The Healing Center. It’s real, and it’s happening right now, one person, one family at a time.