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It’s Not Your Fault: A Message to Parents of Addicted Loved Ones
Finding Hope Family Support Groups
Written By
Finding Hope Team
It’s Not Your Fault: A Message to Parents of Addicted Loved Ones
Where did I go wrong? Was I blind? How did I not catch this? How could this happen under my roof, under my watch? Am I the worst parent in the world? Did I not do enough to prepare him for temptation? Did I not pray enough? Was I too strict, or not strict enough? Did I not check his/her friends or activities closely enough?
If you are the parent of an addict, you probably know these thoughts well. You’ve probably asked yourself these same questions over and over again. The guilt, the doubt, the constant wondering how it all happened — it can take you down a painful path of self-destruction.
But before you go any further down that road, hear this: You did not cause their addiction.
Addiction doesn’t care about anyone’s family history or upbringing. It doesn’t care how much someone was loved, what kind of home they grew up in, or how strong their faith was. It doesn’t care about income, race, or background. Addiction is no respecter of persons — it will go after anyone and everyone.
So stop looking back, trying to pinpoint the exact moment things went wrong. Stop replaying all the “what ifs.” The truth is simple: It’s not your fault.
And while it may not feel like it right now, your love still matters — more than you could ever imagine. Below are a few quotes from those in recovery today. They all have one thing in common: a love and gratitude for their mother.
“I wish my mom knew that I never stopped thinking about her and always loved her.”
“I wish my mom had known that I was doing what I thought was keeping her and my family safe from me. And that I always loved her even if it seemed like I didn't.”
“I wish my mom knew that her love was what kept me alive.”
“For we are each responsible for our own conduct.” Galatians 6:5
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